How The Grinch Stole My Margarita

Every Who down In TannersWHOville, liked tequila a lot,

But the Grinch, who lived just west of TannersWHOville, did NOT!

The Grinch hated tequila! He hated Margaritas!

He didn't think drinks should be named for Señoritas.

He didn't like spirits or any fun drinks,

Don't ask us why cause his reasoning stinks.

It could be his head wasn’t screwed on just right.

It could be, perhaps, that his shoes were too tight.

But we think that the most likely reason of all,

was his liquor cabinet was two sizes too small.

He stood on his mountain, hating the Whos,

I must find a way to stop all of this booze!

So he loaded his sleigh and took off with a squeak,

straight down the mountain toward Barley Creek.

Then he slithered and slunk, and crawled in full throttle,

Around the distillery, he stole every bottle.

Vodka! And Gin! Whiskey! And Rum!

He took the last bottle of Mojito, that bum.

As he turned to leave, he spied next to the still,

a bottle of Blanco just sitting to chill.

His lips curled up in a most Grinchy sneer,

Tell me exactly, what do we have here?

A shiny new spirit, they call me Agave.

They just released me, say happy birthday.

But are you tequila? The Grinch wanted to know.

Technically, tequila must be made in Mexico.

I’m made from blue agave, triple-distilled and unaged.

With a smooth, lovely taste that won’t be upstaged.

Won’t you try just a sip? Just one small little quaff?

I promise that I won’t make your clothes all fall off.

So the Grinch took a sip, and then took one more.

Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before.

Maybe Agave, he thought, can make spirits soar.

Maybe spirits, craft spirits, are worthy to pour.

And what happened then? Well, in TannersWHOville they say,

The Grinch’s liquor cabinet grew THREE sizes that day!

He made reservations, for dinner he'd stay,

Then he, the Grinch HIMSELF, poured Agave.

He toasted the Whos, told them to get to the Creek,

to pick up some booze for now and next week,

Or to order online in a small shopping spree,

to ship Barley Creek spirits to friends in PA and DC.

So raise your glass up to Grinches and friends,

To keep spirits high as this year finally ends,

With warm-hearted toasts to that coming day when

All of us can be back together again

**Actually not every Who loved tequila - only Whos who are at least 21 years of Who-age my indulge